Constellation Term 2 & 3 Mega Post

This is my post for constellation terms 2 & 3 as I think a lot of my frustrations, idea and such would work together all at once better than being separated.

For my last essay, I received criticism which essentially amounted to an accidental first person statement in the essay, a citing which (couldn’t) be cited with an author name and therefore was corrected for it and basically asking for more detail in the topics I used to contrast the baby cage. In general I really struggled with that essay so the fact I got that many marks for it made me really pleased and I do think that any detail I did give on the subject was sorely lacking. However I am feeling vilified in that it was only 500 words so especially for someone like me who rambles a lot, that was…I think a good effort? I don’t know, I hope I manage to do a passing amount this term as well.

And now to start off my group for term two was the Body in Society group by Ashley Morgan.

I was ill for a lot of the lessons so the only two I really attended were the week 3 and week 6 lectures on Bodies and Identity and Bodies and Affordance respectively. I did read all the weekly readings and look at all the power points for each week as well as take notes when there were recaps of the last lectures so I feel like I did get a fair bit out of it even if I missed a ton of the core material and interaction.

I found the subjects quite fascinating in themselves, talking about the fact we only perceive a certain amount of functions to one object, how we unconsciously follow trends and popular things in everyday society and all of those other concepts seemed really exciting. Although some of the academic reading did seem to reach a little bit.

As for how they would apply to art or to practise, I believe the history of the ban on free study of the body would be a great subject to explore in a project at some point just to see how it impacted the art scene in those periods and areas where it was restricted (obviously wouldn’t have been everywhere).

The panoptican seemed like an extremely extensive thought experiment and seemed to ring true when I think back to when I was younger and used to watch the words I said in school (Christian schools aren’t fond of “god” being used so it was potentially a really silly thing to be told off for) at least from personal experience.

Following the social norms unconsciously seemed interesting as well because the saying that most go for the easy path and going off the beat and track is difficult sort of rings true in that sort of case. Easiness brings stability, hardness could be risky but also brings great reward if you get a bit of luck.

Those I think were the main topics that sort of caught my eye because it seemed like a lot of them later all seem to fall into a couple of theories, involving Foucault, bodies reflecting things, affording objects and how they’re made for our bodies t use, identity and how much we impose our personalities and identities onto everything we do and how we are shaped by our environments and societal expectations.

So with that I originally was thinking about exploring the aspects of the body through what could be gendered called gendered illnesses I suppose? It mostly revolved around the idea of women and the moving womb and the history of art and of portraying women as hormonal or needing to be owned by a man or essentially married and made love to enough to not end up with some illness that sounds awfully illegitimate at the time (and only as an excuse to lock ladies up, shut them up or get them to be married earlier).

That sort of gradually evolved into the desire to explore something more than hysteria because that is possibly a bit too narrow in premise and not entirely on topic to it involving the body (except sexuality being used as a weapon against women I suppose, no libido for you ladies). In general it took a ton of time and reading to try to properly decide on what I would do, a tutorial with Ashley Morgan allowed me to think about other aspects such as Subject/Object, power and control and what is called the medical gaze.

In essence I think the essay will talk about devaluing people(turning from subject to object, I guess), identity, control and power over the disabled/ill (or people called ill who aren’t necessarily actually ill).

I have found it extremely difficult to actually clear my head with explaining the topics and being clear on what my question is and how I will explain it and in general jut having an extremely difficult way of working. I am and have struggled pretty intensely with staying on point and in topic with this subject and just in general organising what I’m even speaking about.

Am I like

speaking about x

or am I speaking about x

and am I going into detail enough?

I just in general felt like the entire process has been extremely trying for me but that’s a good thing, I hope it means it’ll be easier next time. I’m not done with it yet as I’m writing this but I really hope I will be able to get over these clouds of doubt and doubts of the quality of writing as I go along, refine it, make it flow as best as I can and send it in with adequate citing.

I certainly think I very much need to push myself to not feel…guilty about not necessarily reading as fast as I can for the specific reading for the subject (even if the subject while interesting can be mind numbing when you’re reading about it) and just lay it out with ideas as fast as possible so that the process can be free of all the stress is can hold.

More to be added after I have legitimately completed the essay, possibly in a follow up post.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s